What can we do when we have our menses in Ramadan?
Our Iman will be so low as we cannot join others in doing fast and Tarawih. By the time we finish our period, others are so far ahead in reading their Quran. We end up losing the momentum and find that our Ramadan is not filled with as much ibadaat as others.
1. Change your mindset.
Be happy that you are having your menses! Having menses during Ramadan does not decrease our ibadaat, it is the time to INCREASE our ibadaat in Ramadan. The One who gives us a womb knows best that women need this break from certain ibadaat such as Tarawih and fast itself as they are needed to support others in their ibadaat which in return gives women more rewards.
This is explained by Prophet Muhamamd SAW to Asthma’ Bin Yazeed when she and the other women found it unfair that the men can do more ibadaat compared to women who have the household and children to care for.
Addressing Asma’ , the Prophet said :
”Listen carefully, and then go and tell the women who sent you that when a woman seeks the pleasure of her husband and carries out her domestic functions to his satisfaction, she gets the same reward as men get for all these services to Allah.”
This applies to mothers who cannot go to the mosque to pray as they have small babies to care for. In fact, I would like to share that my husband prays Tarawih at home most of the time.
His reason: So that his mum and I who are unable to pray at the mosque will get the reward of a Jemaah prayer and so that our small children get to feel the beauty of Tarawih prayers in our small humble “mosque” with ease.
By doing this, he has taught me that Ramadan is more than just Tarawih in mosques and doing ibaadat for yourself. It is about making a difference to those around you. Just like what our Prophet Muhammad SAW said:
” The best of you are the most beneficial to people” and in another hadith: “The best of you are the one best to his family.”
2. Helping others start from the home.
Sometimes we go all out to volunteer at the mosques and others when our mothers are struggling to do household chores and prepare iftar at home while she is fasting. Take the time when you are having your menses to lessen her burden. Prepare the iftar for her and wake up early to prepare sahur for the family. Do not wake up late just because we do not have to sahur. Do the household chores for her while she is praying Subuh and reading the Quran. While she is doing her Tarawih, do the household chores for her so that she can rest and ibaadat more the next day.
4. Start making Eid cookies!
Or kuih raya, as they are referred to here in the Malay Archipelago. When we do our cookies, make the intention of doing them to make our guests happy. Making our guests happy is one of the greatest ibaadat in Islam. Make more cookies and share them with your neighbors (Muslims or not), your parents, your colleagues, single mothers, abandoned elderly and orphans. While making the cookies, increase your ibadaat by doing zikir.
5. Understand what Allah is telling you.
While others are doing their Tarawih, this is your chance to read the meaning of the Quran. While reading it in Arabic is a great ibadaat, understanding and contemplating on the meaning of Allah’s words is a greater one. Carry a translation or tafseer of the Quran around and read them in the public train, buses, and while others are praying.
I leave you to think of other “ibadaat” that you can do during your menses. Think positive about having your menses during Ramadan and you may never know that the most impactful week during your Ramadan might just be the time of your period, in shaa Allah.
Image source: forward thinking.org